Rabbi Ted Falcon

Rabbi Ted Falcon, PhD, one of the pioneers of contemporary Jewish and interfaith spirituality, is a writer, teacher, and spiritual counselor in private practice.

Articles From Rabbi Ted Falcon

page 1
page 2
page 3
page 4
page 5
41 results
41 results
7 Jewish People Who Made Significant Positive Contributions

Article / Updated 10-19-2023

The Jewish people have made tremendous contributions in politics, law, religion, and science. Here are just a few notable Jewish thinkers — names of people you should know for their contributions to society and the modern world. David Ben-Gurion Rightfully known as Israel's founding father, David Ben-Gurion (1886–1973) led Israel's War of Independence in 1948, and then he guided the country as prime minster for the next 15 years. Ben-Gurion was a fiercely stubborn man, and his charisma and force of will often seemed to hold Israel together in difficult times. On the other hand, his decisions were not always pretty. He argued against the extreme policies of the fanatically anti-British Jewish militant group, called the Irgun, and he went so far as to order the Israeli Army to fire on and sink a ship on which they were bringing arms. A staunch socialist, passionately Jewish but not religious, Ben-Gurion became the face of Israel in the 1950s and early 1960s. Albert Einstein Albert Einstein (1879–1955), likely the best-known Jew in the modern world, was a theoretical physicist who changed the way we think about the universe. Born and raised in Germany, he was a notoriously slow learner as a child but blossomed after receiving his doctorate and landing a temporary job as a patent clerk in Bern, Switzerland. In 1905, Einstein published several revolutionary ideas, including his theory of relativity and the equation E=mc2 (establishing the relationship between energy and matter). His work earned him a Nobel Prize in 1921. The rise of the Nazi party forced Einstein to emigrate from Germany to the United States, where he became an American citizen and a professor at Princeton. Although nonobservant, he was proud of his Jewish identity. His brilliance and his humor often combined in interesting ways, as in this famous quote: "If my theory of relativity is proven successful, Germany will claim me as a German and France will declare that I am a citizen of the world. If my theory should prove to be untrue, then France will say I am a German, and Germany will say I am a Jew." Golda Meir Born in Russia and educated in America, Golda Meir (1898–1978) was a young school teacher in Milwaukee, Wisconsin when she became involved in the Zionist movement and decided to move to Palestine. She quickly became a close associate of David Ben-Gurion and soon after Israel's independence, she became Israel's first ambassador to the Soviet Union. By 1969, Meir was Prime Minister of Israel and so well known internationally that to this day, she is simply known as "Golda." As stubborn as Ben-Gurion, Golda not only opposed a Palestinian state, she also denied the existence of the Palestinian people. One favorite Golda-ism is: "Let me tell you something that we Israelis have against Moses. He took us 40 years through the desert in order to bring us to the one spot in the Middle East that has no oil!" Reb Nachman In the late 18th century, Reb Nachman (1772–1810; often called Reb Nachman of Breslov, or Bratzlav) was considered a heretic and was even excommunicated by a group of rival rabbis for his radical teachings, which became the basis of a black-hatted Hasidic sect of Judaism. Reb Nachman is now considered one of the greatest Jewish thinkers in history. Reb Nachman preached living life with joy and happiness, emphasizing the importance of ecstasy over strict intellectualism. Nachman taught that despair was the greatest sin, and Jews still sing his famous words in a popular folksong: "All the world is but a narrow bridge over which people need to cross. And the most important thing, the most crucial thing, is not to be afraid at all." Ruth Bader Ginsburg Ruth Bader Ginsburg (born in Brooklyn, New York, in 1933) became the second woman and first Jewish woman to sit on the United States Supreme Court (the first Jew on the Court was Louis Brandeis, appointed in 1916). Her parents were immigrants, and she was raised with a solid Jewish education. During her confirmation hearings, she offered the following recollection: "I grew up during World War II in a Jewish family. I have memories as a child, even before the war, of being in a car with my parents and passing a place in [Pennsylvania], a resort with a sign out in front that read: 'No dogs or Jews allowed.' Signs of that kind existed in this country during my childhood. One couldn't help but be sensitive to discrimination living as a Jew in America at the time of World War II." Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneersohn Many of the black-suited traditional Hasidic Jews that you see in America are members of the Chabad-Lubavitch movement, which was spearheaded by Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneersohn (1902–1994) in the latter half of the 20th century. Under Rabbi Schneersohn's leadership, Chabad-Lubavitch became the largest of the Hasidic groups, particularly active in working to free Russian Jews in the 1970s and 1980s, and putting representatives on college campuses. Many Lubavitchers revere Reb Schneersohn (known simply as "the Rebbe") so much that they truly believe that he was the Messiah. Zalman Schachter-Shalomi Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi (born in Poland in 1924) fled Nazi oppression and arrived in the United States as a teenager. Ordained as a Lubavitcher Hasidic rabbi, he later studied psychology and taught Jewish mysticism and the psychology of religion at Temple University. Schachter-Shalomi is considered a founder of the Jewish Renewal movement, which began in the early 1970s, intending to invigorate Jewish life with greater spirituality and celebration. Reb Zalman has long participated in interfaith dialogues, including a famous trip to India in 1997, along with a group of other Jewish leaders, to speak with the Dalai Lama. The rabbi is also known for his work on spiritual eldering, based on his 1995 book From Age-ing to Sage-ing.

View Article
What Is Yom Kippur?

Article / Updated 09-14-2023

Many non-Jews (as well as Jews who had little connection with their heritage growing up) find Yom Kippur, which literally means “The Day of Atonement,” baffling. The holiday has no Christian equivalent. But even though most Jews can’t explain why Yom Kippur resonates so deeply for them, they’re drawn to Yom Kippur services, even if it’s the only time they wander into a synagogue all year. For many Jews, Yom Kippur services provide a chance to say, “I’m still Jewish, even if I don’t know what that means.” For other Jews, Yom Kippur is the highlight of their year, a day that seems sad but is actually uplifting, a day during which “atonement” becomes “at-one-ment.” They feel an extraordinary sense of release and spiritual unity that comes with forgiveness. Seeking forgiveness from God Aside from being a holiday when people strive to let go of grudges, seek forgiveness, and unite with each other, Yom Kippur also serves as an important time to seek forgiveness from God. This High Holy Day is called the Shabbat of Shabbats, and is traditionally seen as the day on which God finalizes the judgment of all Jews each year, sealing people’s names in the Books of Life or Death. Yom Kippur is the last chance to change, to repent, and to atone before this judgment. By the time Yom Kippur rolls around, Jews are expected to have asked for forgiveness for sins against other people. The actual day of Yom Kippur is then reserved for atoning for sins against God. Of course, if you believe that God is One (and includes everything), then all our sins impact everyone on some level. Repenting When most people hear the word repentance, they think of a system in which some authority figure absolves people of their sins. In Judaism, however, there is no such authority. Jewish tradition clearly states that Yom Kippur offers a blanket forgiveness from God if (and only if) you have both repented and atoned for any wrongs. The Hebrew word for repentance is teshuvah, which signifies a psychological or emotional “turning,” resulting in a retargeting of your life. The word for “sin” in Hebrew is khet, an archery term that means “missing the mark.” The Hebrew meaning exposes an important difference between the Christian and Jewish concepts of sin. Jews don’t believe in original sin, believing instead that each person is born innocent. Judaism also believes that each person is responsible only for his or her own sins or mistakes. To a Jew, sinning means going astray, not following through, or losing focus. Certainly, lack of honesty or integrity is sinful, as is ignoring or contradicting the Jewish laws. But an unconscious or accidental omission or slight can also be considered sinful. Jewish sin isn’t just what you do; it can even be what you don’t do. For example, walking by someone in need can be considered a sin because of the missed opportunity to do a good deed. Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav said that the worst sin is despair, perhaps because it so deeply undermines faith. Jews believe that there are three ways of sinning: sinning against God (making a vow that you don’t keep or violating ritual law), sinning against another person (acting illegally, hurtfully, or deceitfully), and sinning against yourself (hiding behind addictive behavior or bringing harm to yourself). Although Yom Kippur stresses the sins against God, the High Holidays as a whole encourage people to focus on all three types of sin, providing an opportunity to actively seek and extend forgiveness, and freeing people to act with greater integrity and truthfulness in the New Year. Atonement has more to do with actually making amends, fixing something that you have broken. Just apologizing isn’t enough; you have to find a way to make reparation. A rabbi might help you discover a suitable action, but ultimately he or she can’t prescribe anything — that’s between you and the other person, or between you and God. The Talmud (record of rabbinic teachings) states that you can’t just go out and sin with the understanding that you’ll be forgiven by God on Yom Kippur. You can’t circumvent the important work of reconciliation with yourself, your family, your neighbors, and so on. Ultimately, the point of all of this is to change, to grow, and to develop. In fact, the ancient Jewish rabbis taught that you haven’t fully repented until you’re twice confronted with the opportunity to engage in the same sin, and you refuse. Although Yom Kippur is traditionally the last day to atone, Judaism ultimately says that the doors of repentance are open all the time — it’s never too late. But if there wasn’t at least a symbolic deadline, would anyone ever really get around to it? How to forgive others Jewish tradition identifies three stages in the process of forgiveness, whether you’re being forgiven or you’re forgiving others. The steps are identified by the words s’lichot (“forgiveness”), m’khilah (“letting go”), and kapparah (“atonement”). Forgiveness begins with the conscious intention to forgive. But if the process ends there, the feelings of guilt or resentment reappear when you least expect them. Letting go means, “I no longer need the past to have been any different than it was.” At this stage, you may remember the pain, but you are no longer consumed either with guilt or resentment. With atonement, you can accomplish something positive that otherwise wouldn’t have been possible. You still remember, and you still may feel the pain, but the act of atonement transforms the pain into a blessing. Observing Yom Kippur Most Jewish holidays are distinguished by what you’re supposed to do; Yom Kippur, however, is famous for what you’re not supposed to do. Tradition states that on this day Jews should refrain from bathing luxuriously (though necessary washing with cold water to remove dirt is okay), anointing themselves with perfume or moisturizers, having sex, wearing leather (the soles of shoes, specifically, though some Jews don’t wear any leather), and — probably the most-commonly observed restriction — eating or drinking. Of course, because Jews consider Yom Kippur to be like Shabbat, all the regular Shabbat restrictions apply. Fasting, but not quickly Rabbis have interpreted the fast — which lasts for 25 hours from sundown to just after sundown — in a number of ways: Some say that fasting afflicts the body (because eating is pleasurable) and thereby atones for every sin committed that hasn’t been atoned for in another way. Instead of seeing the fast as a punishment, many rabbis see it as freeing Jews from thinking about ordinary things, which allows them to focus on their prayers and the spiritual energies of the day. The fact that humans can choose to fast symbolizes the freedom of choice that gives humans a greater responsibility in the world than other animals. Yom Kippur is like the prayer before a meal, and the meal is the whole year to come. So just as you wouldn’t eat during a blessing, you don’t eat during Yom Kippur. The Talmud states that you shouldn’t fast if you’re really sick, pregnant (or recovering from giving birth), or if you’re under 13 years old. Some children refrain from eating one or two meals during the day as a way to “warm up” to the fast they’ll perform when they get older. And although tradition clearly calls for a fast from both food and fluid, some Jews do drink a little water throughout the day. No, you can’t eat at McDonald’s, even if they do serve “fast” food. Here are a few suggestions to think about if you choose to fast: Most healthy adults can last a month or more without eating. However, you do need water. If you’re going to go without fluids on Yom Kippur, make sure you drink a lot in advance. However, avoid alcohol or caffeine, which dry you out. If you’re avoiding fluids, don’t eat salty foods (pickled or smoked foods, commercial tomato sauce, and so on) the day before. Doctors report that the nausea and headaches that some people experience when fasting have nothing to do with not eating or drinking. Rather, these symptoms are generally the result of caffeine withdrawal. Laying off caffeine a day or two earlier may help significantly. Some traditional Jews bring fragrant herbs or essential oils with them to synagogue in order to nourish the soul through smell. Others find that smelling such fragrances just makes them hungrier. After the fast, don’t pig out (pun intended). It’s best to begin your “break-fast” meal with a couple glasses of juice in order to put some sugar into your bloodstream. A first-timer's guide to Yom Kippur services Yom Kippur services vary radically depending on the observance of the synagogue. A traditional Orthodox service might be wonderfully intense, but deeply indecipherable for the novice. More liberal congregations may have a much simpler makhzor (Holy Day prayer book), leaving out some of the readings and prayers in favor of more explanation or a break between services. Here are a few things to keep in mind when you show up for services: Like at Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur services require buying tickets in advance at most synagogues. If money is tight, try calling ahead to see if they offer a sliding scale. Remember that many Jews don’t wear leather shoes during Yom Kippur, and some wear no leather at all. So while most Jews wear their finest clothes, you may see people in suits or dresses wearing canvas high-tops, sneakers, or other shoes made without leather. Most Jews who attend services also fast on Yom Kippur, so if you bring any food or drink, keep it out of sight (and smell). Don’t expect the best hygiene of your neighbors on this day. Traditional Jews don’t brush their teeth or bathe on Yom Kippur. Yom Kippur is an ideal time to remember that all human beings make mistakes; the important thing is to continually review your life, learn, and grow. With this in mind, don’t worry if you can’t pronounce all the words of the prayers, or if you mess something up. By showing up and trying, you fulfill the spirit of the day. At the very end of the Yom Kippur services, when the Neilah has concluded, a member of the congregation blows one long blast on the shofar (ram’s horn). Yom Kippur is now over. Believe it or not, many Jews then stick around for the evening service, which follows immediately. Others rush for the doors in search of their break-fast meal. Either way, it’s become a tradition that after the meal, Jews go out and hammer two pieces of wood together or plant a stake in the ground to signify that they’ve begun to build a sukkah (a temporary structure) in preparation for Sukkot. Some teachers point out that this shifts attention from your own emotional and spiritual rebuilding during the High Holidays to a renewed focus on rebuilding and repairing the world around you. Honoring the light of Yom Kippur On Yom Kippur, Jewish tradition says that the day itself makes the atonement. Something about the day carries the energy of healing and forgiveness and touches on the deeply human need for the release of guilt and resentment. In the eighteenth century, an Italian kabbalistic scholar named Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto wrote that, “Any great light that radiated at a certain time, when that time comes around again, the radiance of that light will shine again … and be available for whoever is there to receive it.” Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, is such a time of radiant light — the radiant light of forgiveness. If the day itself carries such energy, then the task of the participant is to allow herself to be fully present, to allow himself to be available for the healing influences of the moment.

View Article
Judaism For Dummies Cheat Sheet

Cheat Sheet / Updated 02-22-2022

Understanding Judaism begins with looking at significant historical events that shaped the Jewish culture and learning the Hebrew alphabet, Jewish blessings, and Jewish words and phrases.

View Cheat Sheet
Attending Your First Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

Many people — Jewish and non-Jewish — get invited to a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah ceremony sooner or later, making it one of the most visible Jewish rituals. Nonetheless, some folks turn down the invitation because they're not sure what is expected of them at a Bar/Bat Mitzvah. Here's all you need to know about attending a Bar/Bat Mitzvah: Attendees are rarely expected to do anything at a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah ceremony except look proud of and impressed by the boy or girl. All men should wear a yarmulke (kippah), which is a skullcap worn by Jewish men and boys in the synagogue (and by Orthodox and Conservative Jewish men in the home) during the service. If you don't have a yarmulke, you can usually borrow one as you enter a synagogue. Gifts are almost universally expected — unfortunately, for some kids this is the main reason to have the ceremony. Fountain pens were once the traditional gift (so much so that a Jewish child could get through college without ever buying a pen). The gift doesn't have to be big, and often family members and friends just give the boy or girl money. Traditionally, a monetary gift is given in multiples of 18. (In Hebrew numerology, the numerical value of the Hebrew letters that make up the word chai, or "life," is 18.) If the service is held on Shabbat (the Jewish day of rest), send the gift directly to the home rather than bring it to the ceremony. This is particularly true if the family is more traditional and refrains from carrying things on Shabbat. When the ceremony is over, congratulate the Bar Mitzvah boy or Bat Mitzvah girl by saying "Mazel Tov!" At the reception, you may want to wait to eat or drink until you know whether a blessing will be given first.

View Article
Celebrating the Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

Bar Mitzvah means "son of the commandment," and Bat Mitzvah means "daughter of the commandment." Jewish tradition says that when girls turn 12 and boys turn 13, they take on new responsibilities in the community. In traditional congregations, this is the point at which boys are expected to start donning tefillin and performing daily prayers, and girls are expected to learn the ways of keeping a home. Even though in today's world no one expects these teenagers to suddenly become adults after the ceremony, Jews honor this change with ritual: Boys are automatically Bar Mitzvah at age 13 and a day, and girls are Bat Mitzvah at age 12 and a day. The ceremony is almost always scheduled at a synagogue on the Saturday morning Torah reading that follows the child's birthday, but this varies. Because of scheduling conflicts at synagogues, some Bar/Bat Mitzvahs are set for weeks or even months after the birthday. The event can be held anywhere, even at home, and it doesn't require a rabbi to be present. Some families even travel to Jerusalem to perform this rite. Also, the ceremony can be any morning that the Torah is read during services (Monday, Thursday, and Shabbat). Leading up to the Bar/Bat Mitzvah, the boy or girl takes classes or works one on one with his or her rabbi. They must learn enough Hebrew to read from the Torah (and often Haftarah, too — the section from the Prophets associated with each Torah portion) and master enough Jewish history and law to understand the context of what they're reading. As the event starts, traditionally, the father is called to the Torah for an aliyah ("going up," since Torah is read from a raised portion of the synagogue) before the congregation. He says a blessing that thanks God for relieving him of legal responsibility for any future negative actions of his child. This blessing is almost always omitted in more liberal congregations. Instead, the parents may take the opportunity to address the child publicly, saying how proud they are of him or her. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah (the child) is called up, usually to read the final lines of the Torah portion, called the maftir, followed by the Haftarah reading. In many cases, especially when the boy or girl doesn't know Hebrew very well, it's sufficient to recite the blessing before and after the Torah reading, (this probably reflects the original ritual of Bar Mitzvah). Remember that reading the Torah is difficult: The text has no written vowels, and so both the pronunciation of words and their melody must be memorized. In some cases, the Bar/Bat Mitzvah just chants the Haftarah portion for the week, and sometimes members of the family are brought up to share in the Torah reading. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah follows the maftir with a d'var Torah, a short talk in which the child tells about how the readings to his or her life. However, today, this speech is just as often a time to thank parents and teachers, or an opportunity for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah to make a statement about who he is or what she believes in. After the child's d'var Torah, the parents (often) give a short speech to their son or daughter. Then the rabbi may give a short sermon and bless the Bar or Bat Mitzvah before the worship service continues. The worship service concludes, and the family of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah hosts a celebration gathering. Jewish tradition states that some sort of seudat mitzvah ("festive meal") is required. " According to Jewish tradition, after children have had a Bar/Bat Mitzvah, they are considered adults from a religious perspective — they are obligated to observe the commandments and may lead prayer and other religious services in the family and community. But in today's world, few adolescents are in a position to make a deep religious commitment. Therefore, most teens from non-Orthodox Jewish communities continue their study of the Torah for a few years and then make a conscious choice to become members of the Jewish community.

View Article
Five Jewish People Who Have Contributed to the Arts

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

Judaism — more than a religion, a set of ideas, or a system of ethics — is a People. Here are five famous Jewish people who have contributed to literature and film. Sholom Aleichem Widely known as the "Jewish Mark Twain," Sholom Aleichem (1859–1916) is perhaps the best-known Yiddish author. Like Twain, he used a pen name (Sholom Aleichem's real name was Solomon Rabinowitz; Twain's was Samuel Clemens), and like Twain he primarily wrote about life in small towns. Sholom Aleichem's towns were the Ashkenazi shtetls (small towns or villages) of nineteenth- and early-twentieth-century Russia, and his characters became known to almost every Yiddish-speaking Jew around the world. Today, many Jews and non-Jews know Sholom Aleichem's work from the musical Fiddler on the Roof, which was based on his stories and characters, including the famous Tevye the Dairyman. (If you haven't seen this musical, rent it on DVD or stream it immediately.) Sholom Aleichem and Mark Twain actually did meet once, in New York. Upon meeting Twain, Sholom Aleichem said, "They call me the Jewish Mark Twain," and Twain replied, "They call me the American Sholom Aleichem." Anne Frank Anne Frank (1929–1945) was only 16 when she died at the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp, but her diary relating her family's two years of hiding from the Nazis has made her undisputedly the most famous of the six million Jewish people killed in the Holocaust. While friendly non-Jewish neighbors hid her family in the back of a house in Amsterdam, Holland, Anne Frank wrote surprisingly profound and insightful diary entries. At the end, her family was betrayed. The Nazis took them, looted the house, but left papers, including the diary. Anne's father, Otto, was the family's sole survivor, and he later helped publish his daughter's recovered diary. If you're ever in Amsterdam, visit the Anne Frank House — it's a powerful memorial. Steven Spielberg Steven Spielberg (born in Cincinnati, Ohio, in 1946), one of the most influential and popular filmmakers in history, was perhaps born to entertain — after all, spiel is a Yiddish word that means a drawn-out story or play. His films include Close Encounters of the Third Kind, E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, Jaws, Jurassic Park, Raiders of the Lost Ark, The Color Purple, Saving Private Ryan, and Lincoln. But among many Jews, the filmmaker is best known for Schindler's List, based on the true story of Oskar Schindler, who saved the lives of more than a thousand Jews during the Holocaust. Spielberg won the Academy Award for Best Director in 1993 for Schindler's List, and he used the profits from the film to fund the nonprofit Shoah Foundation, which has so far filmed the testimony of over 50,000 Holocaust survivors. Adin Steinsaltz Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz (born in 1937) is one of the most influential and brilliant Talmudic scholars in history. He is also a writer on the Jewish mystical traditions. The author of over 50 books, he is best known for his 6,200-page translation and commentary of the Talmud into modern Hebrew and English, a task that took 45 years. Elie Wiesel While Elie Wiesel (born in 1928) has long been best known as a writer, he won the 1986 Nobel Prize for Peace, not Literature, based on his writings and his efforts to educate the world about the Holocaust. Perhaps his best-known work is the book Night, which recreates his experience as a teenager at the Auschwitz and Buchenwald concentration camps. However, Wiesel has also written and lectured extensively on the plight of the Soviet Jews and many other oppressed groups.

View Article
Hosting a Meaningful Party after a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

The most controversial aspect of Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah ceremonies these days is the party that follows them. Jewish tradition states the family of the child who's having a Bar/Bat Mitzvah must host some sort of seudat mitzvah ("festive meal"). However, in recent decades this little party has too often grown into a grand affair (some would say of social one-upsmanship). These are the nights when folks remember the "Bar" more than the "Mitzvah." You've probably heard stories of families spending a small fortune on an outrageous Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah celebration simply because it has to be "the best Bar/Bat Mitzvah party ever." Sure, both children and their parents have social pressures, but it's much more important to focus on the meaning of the day rather than how much you can spend on a party. Here are a few ways that you can make the Bar/Bat Mitzvah celebration special without going overboard: Choose a reasonable allowance for the celebration and then sit down with your son or daughter and work on the budget together. This is an excellent time for you to teach your child about being responsible with money by helping him choose where and how to spend it. Consider asking your child to do some volunteer work before the Bar/Bat Mitzvah and celebration. Some congregations require that the boy or girl complete some sort of community service before the big day, as a mitzvah project. Even if your congregation doesn't, you can suggest that your child take on some responsibilities for her community and the greater good. Link the celebration to a charity. For example, many people commit three percent of the total cost of the celebration to Mazon: A Jewish Response to Hunger, a non-profit organization that funds soup kitchens and other food programs for those in need. Plan what your child does with any monetary gifts. He may decide to allot a percentage of the money to charity (you can even ask him to research and pick the charities). This strengthens the lesson that being Bar/Bat Mitzvah is not just about being responsible for oneself, but also for the rest of the world. Make the event a family affair. Shop for a tallit (prayer shawl) with your child, or help your child make a bag to carry the tallit in. Let your son or daughter pick out books about Judaism and then read them together in preparation. Let your child add special readings, poems, prayers to the ceremony itself, or request special food or music for the party afterwards. Find ways to give additional rights and responsibilities to your child. Perhaps raise your child's allowance and allow a later bedtime, but also ask her to perform more chores around the house. Ultimately, the Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony and celebration offers an opportunity for the child to learn that he or she can work hard, complete a big task, and gain a better sense of self in the process. The party should honor that work and that person, not just be a flash in the pan. And when the community truly welcomes the Bar or Bat Mitzvah with added respect, as well as with deeper expectations, he or she can experience a true deepening of personal identity and responsibility.

View Article
Understanding the Jewish Calendar

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

The Jewish calendar isn't just a tool for observing the passage of time. Judaism marks and celebrates time in a number of ways — holidays, Shabbat, the weekly readings of specific portions of the Torah, and the rituals of the personal life cycle. Months and years in the Jewish calendar The Jewish calendar, unlike the civil Gregorian calendar, is based both on the cycles of the moon as well as the sun — the months correspond to cycles of the moon and the years correspond to cycles of the sun. Since a lunar month has about 29-1/2 days, Jewish months always have either 29 or 30 days. The problem is that 12 lunar months is 10-1/2 days short of the 365-day solar year. In the fourth century, Rabbi Hillel II instituted a mathematical system of rectifying the lunar and solar years which is still used today: The years are divided into 19-year cycles, seven of which are leap years that have 13 months instead of 12. (The details of Hillel's calculations are mind-bogglingly dense.) The 12 Hebrew months are called Nisan, Iyar, Sivan, Tamuz, Av, Elul, Tishrei, Heshvan, Kislev, Tevet, Shvat, and Adar. On leap years, Adar is followed by a month called Adar 2. If your birthday falls in Adar 2, it's celebrated in Adar on non-leap years. The years of the Hebrew calendar are always 3,760 or 3,761 years greater than the Gregorian calendar that most people use. For example, the year 2020 will be the Hebrew years 5780 to 5781 (the discrepancy is because the Hebrew year number changes at Rosh Hashanah, in the fall, rather than on January 1). The calendar is so far ahead because the Jewish calendar is calculated from the creation of the world. Sometime between the ninth and twelfth century CE (Common Era), rabbinic scholars decided — based on tradition and biblical interpretation — that Creation happened in 3761 BC (on October 7 of that year, to be exact). Double-day celebrations in the Jewish calendar In the Jewish calendar, the first of the month always falls on the new moon, and the fifteenth of the month is always a full moon. However, in the ancient days, before science figured out how to predict the new moon, the declaration of a new month came from authorities in Israel (based on the reports by witnesses). But later, rabbis realized that it might take too long to get word from Israel to Jews around the world about when the months began. So a rabbinical decision was made that all holidays (except Yom Kippur) would be observed for an extra day for Jews living outside Israel, just in case the days were counted incorrectly. Days in the Jewish calendar always begin at sunset. The holidays in the following table all begin at sundown the day before the date listed. Calendar of Jewish Holidays 2013-2014/5774 2014-2015/5775 2015-2016/5776 2016-2017/5777 Rosh Hashanah Sept. 5 Sept. 25 Sept. 14 Oct. 3 Yom Kippur Sept. 14 Sept. 26 Sept. 23 Oct. 12 Sukkot Sept. 19 Oct. 9 Sept. 28 Oct. 17 Hanukkah Nov. 25 Dec. 17 Dec. 7 Dec. 25 Tu B'Shvat Jan. 16 Feb. 4 Jan. 25 Feb. 5 Purim March 16 March 5 March 24 March 12 Passover April 15 April 4 April 23 April 11 Shavuot June 4 May 25 June 12 May 31 Tishah B'av Aug. 5 July 26 Aug. 14 Aug. 1

View Article
How to Find a Way to Peace in Judaism

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

War has been with civilization from the beginning of recorded history, like a plague always appearing somewhere on the planet. However, Judaism affirms the primary importance of peace, and the Talmudic rabbis pointed out that “All that is written in the Torah was written for the sake of peace” (Tanhuma Shoftim 18). The rabbis warn that war is most often caused by scarcity of resources (such as food and water) and — often hand in hand — scarcity of righteous behavior, as in this statement from Pirke Avot, the Ethics of the Fathers: “The sword comes into the world because of justice delayed and justice denied.” Our early history is full of war and violence, but Judaism ultimately celebrates the peacemakers and remembers that all humans are expressions of God and must treat neighbors (and even enemies) as such. So while Jewish law condones war in self-defense, it prohibits a wide range of tactics, including poisoning livestock, destroying fruit trees, or laying waste to food or water sources. Similarly, Deuteronomy 20:10 points out that a peaceful solution must be sought before waging any battle, and Proverbs 25:21 notes: “If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat. And if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.” Numerous teachings support the crucial importance of peace, and yet Jews and Judaism have so often been caught up in violence and war. How can Jews break the cycle? Civilization can’t get to peace through war. No war has ever brought the peace it promised, because war creates winners and losers. The winners too often begin to replicate the very power structures they fought against; and the losers soon begin planning their revenge. The rabbis of the Talmud go so far as to declare that if two people need help and one of them is your enemy, help your enemy first — the reason being that it’s always better to overcome your own inclination toward evil (yetzer hara) and convert an enemy to a friend. Here are two more Jewish ethical teachings regarding violence: Murder: Although capital punishment is allowed, one may not murder an innocent person. Genesis 9:6 says: “Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man.” This prohibition is true even if killing will save your own life. Capital punishment: The Bible clearly mandates capital punishment but is very careful about requiring at least two witnesses to support that judgment. Ultimately, however, rabbinic traditions made it so difficult to bring the death penalty that it was practically impossible ever to carry it out. Many Jewish groups are today on record against capital punishment. In all Jewish prayer services there are prayers for peace. Remember that the Hebrew word Shalom, meaning peace, comes from the word “wholeness” or “complete.”

View Article
How to Make the Choice to Circumcise in Judaism

Article / Updated 03-26-2016

Most Jews never question whether to perform a circumcision — it’s simply part of being Jewish. In fact, for an increasing number of Jews, it’s one of the most spiritual and joyful community events. However, for some Jews who have not been brought up connected to their tradition, circumcision becomes a question rather than a certainty. Here are a few ideas to think about when considering circumcision: In the 1960s, about 98 percent of all boys born in the United States were circumcised because of research that said circumcised boys have fewer medical problems, such as a slightly lower rate of urinary tract infections and a lower chance of contracting sexually transmitted diseases. However, many of these health risks can be avoided by careful daily cleaning, and by 2009, fewer than 40 percent of all boys were being circumcised (though almost all Jews still were). In 2007, the World Health Organization endorsed circumcision of boys, calling it, “an important intervention to reduce the risk of heterosexually acquired H.I.V.” Researchers also have strong evidence to suggest that circumcision protects against penile cancer and sexually transmitted diseases, and helps reduce the risk of cervical cancer for female partners. Complications from this procedure are extremely rare and, when they happen, are usually mild. Any pain the boy experiences almost certainly goes away relatively quickly. The child may cry at this event, but it appears that much of this unhappiness comes from being restrained and being surrounded by a bunch of nervous relatives. No parents want their child to suffer, but there is no way to raise a child without pain. You can argue that the baby has no choice in the matter of being circumcised, but sometimes babies don’t get choices — parents must choose the right course for their children, not necessarily the least painful one. If you’re considering not having your boy circumcised, think about this: Suppose that your son happens to grow up to really identify as being Jewish and happens to fall in love with a Jewish woman. Very few rabbis will perform a Bar Mitzvah or a Jewish wedding unless the male is circumcised. Some rabbis teach that the bris is a symbol of taking control over people's animal nature — an obvious reminder that men can control sexual urges and lustful appetites. But ultimately, it’s important to remember that the brit milah connects a boy to hundreds of generations of men before him, each of whom had a bris on the eighth day of his life.

View Article
page 1
page 2
page 3
page 4
page 5